My Story & My Struggles as a Reader
I have a deep love for reading. Books, and the words within them, are treasured in my house. I have shelves of well loved books and stacks ready to read.
However, I have struggled to have consistent reading time for years. Does that surprise you?
When I picture a perfect vacation it involves books. I picture a quiet reading spot. Even if I could spend whatever money, time, or magically transport myself to anywhere. I see myself relaxing with a book.
Either a mountain cabin reading by the fire uninterrupted. Or on a beach relaxing with a literary masterpiece and hearing the ocean. In an amazing library with access to all the books, I could possibly enjoy. Or in a second-hand shop purchasing stacks of books already loved by others. Sigh… Can you smell it? Ahh… that is lovely.
My Reality –
Last fall we did a long trip in our RV with the kids through Utah, Idaho, Oregon, and Northern California. We traveled over 3,300 miles. Stayed in 12 camping sites in 4 states. It was non-stop.
One of my biggest regrets was not having time to read. I packed a bag of books with novels that related to the places we visited. I did not get to open up a single book.
This is a common occurrence.
When we went to Boston in the summer of 2018 I packed half of a suitcase full of books. Yes, we flew there and had limited luggage. Yes, I also packed clothing and supplies for 2 weeks for 6 people. Yes, we stayed in multiple hotels and I carried those suitcases ALL over downtown Boston by myself with 4 kids (Jim was at the office during the day). Did we read them? No, no we did not.
On most weekend RV trips you will find me loading up a bag of books along with my clothing. Often we will be so busy at the campsite my beloved book bag does not even leave the cabinet. When we get back I am so sad that I did not have the time or energy to read.
I have wanted to cultivate the consistent habit of reading for as long as I can remember.
As a kid and a teenager, I remember reading for hours each day. My mom would take my book away to get me to do my chores. I would read outside in the back yard, in my room, in the living room, on vacations, at my grandma’s house, standing in line waiting for something… even as a single adult I would take my book everywhere!
Having young kids changed that for me. I no longer had stretches of time to read for fun. Anything I read was informational and relevant to being a better parent, cook, housekeeper, or wife.
I lost brain space to think about big ideas and imagine faraway places.
Lack of sleep, mountains of laundry, and opinions about homemaking from others kept me from my love of reading.
I was in survival mode.
I also became surrounded by people who did not read. They either saw no value in growth, the time it takes to read, or finding the right book to sit within the evenings.
I questioned why I was different and why reading mattered so much to me.
Yet I was still a reader. I still gathered and processed ideas, just more simplistically and haphazardly. But reading was never relaxed and felt very “necessary”. Not calm and settled.
But now I am enjoying the process. I relax into the chair, eat some dark chocolate, forgetting about what is happening in the rest of the house. I stay there for a while with my book.
I still read a majority of non-fiction and “self-help” genre types, in fact, those are my favorite. My life is still busy with kids, activities, and a full schedule.
But a switch has flipped and I choose to read every night. I have finished 6 books in less than 3 months.
So, What changed?
- My attitude and my sense of identity.
- My communication with others.
- My environment.
These changes are all small but they make the statement that reading matters to me.
To hear more about these ideas see this companion article:
How I Read Every Day – Why Getting A Lamp and Taking My Shoes Off Helps Me Read.
- What stops you from reading?
- Where do you expect to read and then feel disappointed when it does not happen?
- What do you need to feel comfortable reading?
- What expectations do you have about your reading life?
- What are you reading right now?
Here is the link to my articles about my reading – My Reading Stack
My prayer is that you will find joy once again on this reading journey.
Start again, start today. Just a few pages makes a difference.
We can reconnect with this hobby that slows us down and fills us up. We can gather new ideas, visit faraway places, experience new things, and hear from voices of others.
We can choose to make space for this beautiful practice. We can read in our homes every day and not just on vacations that we make up in our heads.
I would love to hear about what you are reading, your reading habits, and how it has impacted you.
Happy Reading! – April
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