restful productivity to live deliberately & avoid overwhelm 

The Overstuffed Suitcase vs. Nurturing My Children

I often add a sense of urgency to education which is not helpful for a learning atmosphere. When I was a teacher in the public school system, I was pushed to have my students perform well on test scores. To fill them up with as much information as I could. The goal was to meet the standards and prove that I “did my job.” I had expectations from parents, school administrators, the state, other schools, and even the kids in my classroom.

This worked for that system. But, as I discovered the hard way, this does not work for homeschooling. In my home and in our homeschool, the approach of “stuffing my kids with knowledge” does not go well. I was trying to apply that mindset and method to a totally different situation. Let me explain.

Photo by Kenny Eliason on Unsplash

My Public School Teacher Mindset

Some struggles I had as a public school teacher and a sample of this “overstuffed suitcase” idea:

  • Everything is a delicate balancing act of many goals and agendas.
  • I had expectations from parents, school administrators, the state, other schools, and the kids.
  • I had over 30 kids and 7 subjects that I was managing in my small 5th-grade classroom.
  • The kids were expected to perform at a certain level on the standardized tests taken in April. The main subjects tested were reading comprehension, grammar, math, and writing.
  • These students did not come to school as a blank slate. They came with emotions and family issues. (Including difficult home situations and childhood trauma.)
  • My time was very limited each day and each school year with these kids.
  • For example: I only had 45 minutes to teach a math lesson. On PE or specials days the schedule is changed so that other teachers take the time I need to teach.
  • I was often forced to cut history or science for lack of time.
  • The days of school were chosen for us. That meant that bad weather, kids’ attitudes, power outages, or gang violence in the neighborhood affected our school days. We just had to keep pushing forward even when the focus was difficult.

My Mom Values and Homeschool-Teacher Mindset

The way that I view homeschooling and what I believe about nurturing my children:

  • I have time. I get to be here for the long term and see my child as a whole person.
  • My husband and I love our children more than any other teacher on this planet. We truly want the best for them. This perspective gives us a unique investment into their future.
  • I see my kids as individuals with different interests, weaknesses, and strengths.
  • The way that my kids perform on a test is not directly related to my income.
  • My kids will do better at different subjects at different times in their maturity. And that is okay.
  • I am working on not being stuck in the outcome mentality. I provide an excellent education for them and they respond in their own way.
  • When my kids struggle with a subject we can slow down and learn it at their speed.
  • I can trust my judgment and my “mom intuition”. I know my kids best and I can adjust what we are doing based on that.
  • Learning is so much more than completed textbooks and curricula.
  • I want my kids to be well-rounded and to have the skills to learn new things on their own.

My Practical Outlook on Education

I do not want to be led by insecurities or unrealistic expectations of others in my homeschooling. I refuse to let fear be how I make my decisions. I want my teaching to be grounded in sound principles and follow solid methods.

The Charlotte Mason approach has always felt like home to me. It encourages individuality, short lessons, time in nature, and seeing education in a well-rounded way.

One of my favorite principles is: Children are born persons. This is beautiful. Especially in a world trying to mold, shape, and force our kids into something “useful”. Gentle growth and nurture are my goals. Guidance and boundaries but with freedom for the kids to make mistakes. Teaching them habits, using rhythms to guide the day, and gentle parenting.

I am not an expert on the Charlotte Mason approach. But here are some that are.

The amazing resources that I use to keep going:


Questions for reflection:

Am I deciding what my homeschool schedule should be based on someone else’s standards?

What is not working in my homeschooling right now?

Do I believe it is my job as a homeschool mom to stuff my children with knowledge?

What if I approached this next month differently? What would that look like?


As a homeschooler, I do not have a year to fill them with as much information as I can so that I can meet the standards and “do my job.” I have (hopefully) a lifetime with my kids. Guiding them, loving them, and being their #1 Encourager. I am going to watch them grow from walking, to spelling, to adding fractions, to learning to drive. I am in this for the long haul (no matter what educational choices we make).

For me, relighting my passion for homeschooling meant starting with a different approach. It began with nurturing and loving my kids. Everything is still a delicate balancing act of many goals and agendas but, I get to choose what matters in our home. When my kids struggle we can slow down. I can trust my judgment.

I hope that you trust your “mom intuition”.

You know your kids best!

👩‍🏫Happy Homeschooling! – April


Most photos were taken by me or Mary Edwards

the other Photos by GioTaylor Heery / Andrew Ebrahim on Unsplash